Kent, a retired army commander, often discussed his marital struggles in therapy: “Doc, get this: Marianne said she needed to take a business trip to Chicago with a male coworker. I did just like you would have told me to do- I calmly asked her not … Continue reading →
Dear male readers (all seven of you. Hint hint, please tag your husband and share this article.), Let’s talk about a little dilemma that I too-often hear about in couples therapy: Your wife is pissed because you won’t tell your overbearing/judgmental … Continue reading →
Reader Asks: I have a step son who while isn’t “special needs,” he has anxiety and general effort issues. He certainly requires more time and energy than my kids to motivate and disciple. That however is not why I write … Continue reading →
Dear spouse of a person whose nerves are raw, You are a vision of patience and deserve an applause. How sweetly you listen to Web MD’s diagnosis, When your spouse knows she has deep vein thrombosis. Hail to you when you don’t roll your eyes, When your partner … Continue reading →
By Angelica Shiels Psy.D. I clean the house once a week, so if you come over near the end of the week, you might notice sticky floors, a smudged refrigerator, and blue kiddy toothpaste all over the upstairs bathroom sink. … Continue reading →
By Angelica Shiels Psy.D. “Family” is not for the faint of heart. As a family therapist and someone who has a family myself, I actually think that marriage licenses and pregnancy tests should offer disclaimers. Similar to the warnings on alcohol and tobacco products, I think … Continue reading →
What you need to know about domestic violence: 1) Violence doesn’t start with hitting and physical abuse. Abuse is about power and control, and begins by the perpetrator gaining power and control in sometimes subtle ways. 2) Yes, women can be … Continue reading →
By Angelica Shiels Psy.D. Why do so many people fall into blazing-hot love, only to find themselves so dissatisfied years later? Well, “Imago relational theory” (just a theory, but I haven’t seen one situation where it doesn’t fit) gives us … Continue reading →
By Angelica Shiels Psy.D. (Article also posted to Lifehack.) I have been reading a lot about the concept of “monogamy” lately. Not just because I am doing research on sexual monogamy for my new professional venture. Actually, the topic is kind of a bizarre hobby … Continue reading →
By Angelica Shiels Psy.D. I was recently reading a great article about ADHD and marriage. Basically, the article described a type of “irritable, selfish, unhelpful, sometimes useless” partner, a partner often described to me in therapy by a frustrated wife, describing her schlub … Continue reading →