When your kid is defiant (The golden rule beats a golden shower.)

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We’ve all been asked to do things  we feel are ridiculous.  Maybe the store-owner asks you to use the restroom stall to breastfeed your kid.  Maybe your mother, forgetting what it’s like to be a parent, tells you that you really should prioritize wiping … Continue reading

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Help! My preteen is super lazy and unmotivated!

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Reader writes: How do you motivate a “lazy” tween? One who shortcuts and half assess everything, even if you hover and will lie his butt off to get out of whatever it is you want from him? My son is 11/6th … Continue reading

An important way your own childhood affects your parenting

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Imagine this scene:  Your third-grader, standing before you with hands on hips, indignantly whines, “Mo-om!  You didn’t remember to add money to my lunch account!!  The lunch lady had to give me a special note today, and it was SO-OH EMBARASSING!  How FLAKY can you … Continue reading

Dealing with your child’s anxiety: The support and accountability balance.

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In a recent blog post, I mentioned that anxiety is currently over-catastrophized and over-diagnosed.  I went on to explain that in years past, a child who feared giving an oral presentation would basically be told to “suck it up and deal,” whereas … Continue reading

Mental Illness and Young Adults: Why College Campuses are in Crisis

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Let’s talk about the mental health of young adults in the United States.  It seems to me, from what I’ve read and observed in my corner of the country, that we are headed for a crisis if something doesn’t change. … Continue reading

“My Teen Uses Depression and Self Injury to Manipulate

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From time-to-time, I hear some variation of, “My child is so manipulative.  She’s only cutting herself and saying she is depressed for attention.  She’s not really that depressed.” When manipulation is suggested, there are several points I typically make to parents: 1) … Continue reading

Reader Asks: My stepson’s father sucks.

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Reader Asks: I have a step son who while isn’t “special needs,” he has anxiety and general effort issues. He certainly requires more time and energy than my kids to motivate and disciple. That however is not why I write … Continue reading

Reader Asks: My kid says she hates herself! What do I do?

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Question: The other day my six year old fell riding her bike.  When I went over to her to comfort her, she was crying because she skinned her knee, but she was also saying she hates herself.  I didn’t know … Continue reading